


In the Midst of Liars

by bookish_cupcake



Series: Liars and Mad Men [1]
Category: Doctor Who (2005), The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Adult!Loki, Avengers - Freeform, Doctor Who series 1-6, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Loki goes crazy, Post-Thor, Pre-Slash, Pre-Thor, kid!loki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-09
Updated: 2012-11-11
Packaged: 2017-11-18 06:56:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/558141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookish_cupcake/pseuds/bookish_cupcake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first encounter is as survivor and child. The second is as rescuer and fallen god. The third may be their last. Each time the Doctor returns, he wears a new face. And each time, the darkness grips Loki tighter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Of Magic and Words

In the Midst of Liars

Everyone remembers the first time they meet the Doctor, the strange man with a funny blue box. Loki thinks he remembers the first time he met the man, but time happens to be very wibbly wobbly.

  
**Chapter One:**  Of Magic and Words

A cool chill swept across the Palace of Asgard as the moon rose. All but one resident fell to slumber. Loki climbed out of bed, careful not to awake his slightly snoring brother. The night called to him. The darkness singing a melody far greater than the sun's light could provide.

He took one last glance at the sleeping form of Thor; to make certain his snore were true. Even now, as children, his older brother dwarfed him. Before he could let a smirk, a sudden crash shook the palace.

Thor immediately leapt out of bed, already in battle stance. His eyes blinked sleepily at the sight of his brother already being out of bed and dressed. "Brother! Have the forces of Jotunheim struck? What was that crash?"

"Nary a clue," replied Loki. "Let us investigate, brother."

The two children ran as quietly as they could down the twisting hallways. Loki grabbed Thor's hand to stop him from turning. He placed his finger on his lips and mouthed:  _I hear Father._ Loki knelt to peak around the corner while his brother stood above.

The hallway they were staring down was not often used. Except for a few getaways after pranks, but Loki wasn't about to grace his brother with such information. There was a large hole gaping of the walls of the room that Loki could never enter. No matter the spells or tricks he employed, nothing would grant him access to that room. Odin and a stranger walked out of the rubble, neither appearing fazed by it. Odin meets their curious eyes, and halts midsentence.

"Come hither, boys! Meet an old friend of mine from years pass!"

Thor ran to their father while Loki trailed behind. They both bowed in respect to the guest, yet only one meant it. The stranger noticed this and paid no mind. Thor grinned, a bear who stumbled upon honey. Whenever a friend of his father's visited, it usually entailed tales of shared battles and exploits.

Before Thor could open his mouth with endless questions, Odin patted the wincing stranger heartily on the shoulders. "Sons, the great man who stands before you is known as the Doctor!" He grinned. "We go centauries back, the Doctor and I."

Loki studied the man curiously. He differed from the other men his father acquainted himself with; the slender frame and lacked long hair. The only emotion the boy could pull from the stranger was ancient weariness. The question rose to mind: how old was the Doctor?

"He will be staying with us for the next week. Longer if he wishes."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to intrude. Times to go, places to see."

Loki raised a brow, a question teetering on his lips. And then his father's loud voice interrupted.

"Nonsense, old friend, you are free to stay as long as you wish. Tomorrow morning, we feast for your return! My servant will show you to your old chamber!"

And like that, the Doctor was whisked off, leaving Thor and Loki behind.

"He saunters off like this is completely normal," Loki muttered.

-(/)-

Before the War, the Doctor could release his senses, reach out and feel the presence of his kin. He breathed and opened his mind. Emptiness was the only response. He swallowed the loneliness in his throat and walked out to the balcony of his guestroom. To any other, the stars would seem alive and glittering.

The Doctor knew the ones missing; the stars and life stolen from innocent people. Wicked knowledge to those who can read the stars. He brought upon himself this isolation, the nagging loneliness in his core. Most of all, he deserved this.

He wished the TARDIS was beside him, not still lying in the crashed room. He wanted nothing more to patch her up and leave this world.

_Why did you bring me here, old girl?_

Stretched out beneath the stars thrived Asgard. Their life sustained from previous conquests and the spoils of war. His sorrow bubbled to quiet rage in the pit of his belly. His mind drifted back to before the Time War, back to when Asgard and Jotunheim fought. In that bleak, desolate Winter, did he choose the wrong side?

He chuckled bitterly.  _Perhaps this place should burn as well._ He sucked in a sharp breath.  _No good in thinking those thoughts._

He felt a presence behind him, regal and familiar. He waited for the gentle voice to speak.

"Your old room is now fixed, Doctor."

"Thank you, Frigga. Tell me, how are your two sons?"

-(/)-

Odin smelled trouble brewing. His esteemed guest and old friend not arriving at the dining hall gave him no grief. The Doctor had come from recent battle after all. The king may be a warrior, yet he accepted that his friend was not. Loki wasn't to be seen in his seat either. Odin reminded himself that the Doctor dealt with far worse than his trickster son.

At that same moment, Loki snuck pass the guards. He took pleasure in it, knowing he was better at something than his thundering brother. According to the information he charmed out of a servant, their mysterious guest resided in the furthest room in the eastern corridor—the same he could not enter.

Unlike last night, the walls stood erect without a hint of crumbling.

A soft blue light glowed from the beneath the door. He clicked his tongue and wished he mastered the spell that made him intangible. He whispered in the incantation to make his small frame invisible and tested to see if the door was unlocked. It opened without a screech.

Well, that saved him the trouble of scaling the palace walls and breaking the windows.

The Doctor sat hunched over a desk, tinkering with wires with a strange device. A cup of barely touched barely sat in the corner. The wires led to the blue box in the middle of the room, its door slightly open for the wires to pass into. The box looked entirely too small to be of that much importance, but Loki quickly stopped that thought process. Small could be good, he reminded himself. His body felt drawn towards the box, something so old; ancient. Like the Doctor.

It sung a song, reminding Loki of the short winter days that graced Asgard; familiar and forbidden.

He stepped closer, his feet moving carefully not to alert the Doctor. The room was grand; a high ceiling, and balcony, murals on the walls of creatures that Loki never even read of. This stranger must be of importance to elicit such comfort from his parents. He noted the untouched bed, the man hasn't slept.

"You're invisible, not silent."

The bundle of chords morphed into snakes. His glowing device, cylindrical in shape, dropped. The man turned in his chair, not paying the least bit attention to the hissing noises behind him.

"I can't say how many times I said that to thin air."

Unlike last night, darkness and tired eyes did not obstruct Loki's view of the man. Once more, he found himself entranced. Any thoughts of running vanished.

_What was that terrible proverb Mother mutters? Ah, curiosity kills the cat._

The Doctor looked straight at invisible child. The man held no grin, but the amusement twinkling in his eyes calmed the child's nerves. Besides, curiosity ringed throughout Loki's core and ignored the possibility of danger. He decided to remain out of sight and walked to a new area. Closer to the box.

"Father calls you the Doctor. The wires and contraption speaks more of a mad man than any medic I know."

The man shifted his gaze, once again locking onto Loki. "Well, mad is certainly one of adjectives people use to describe me. A mad man with a box would be an accurate description."

The readily admittance stirred something inside Loki. The Doctor  _embraced_ the title of madness, a word oft used to describe Loki's actions.

"You are not attending the breakfast that my father has prepared in your honor."

The Doctor snorted. "You looked terribly distraught over this. Or sound like it, should I say."

"Well, I am certain that I will be able to see the look of displeasure on my brother's face later tonight. He eagerly awaits tales of battle that my father's friends bring."

The child awaited the Doctor's response. Was the man like others who spun tales of problems that could easily be sidestepped with a few choice words?

"He's not missing much. I'm more of a runner and thinker than a warrior. Mind you, I have had my fair share of adventures."

Although the Doctor could not see it, Loki tilted his head in interest. "Just what are you a doctor of?"

"If I gave out all my stories to children who visit unannounced, where's the fun in that?"

Loki's brows knitted together. A prince did not take kindly to being referred to as a child by a stranger. A snake began coiling around the Doctor's arm before popping into smoke.

"Fantastic," murmured the man. "I can never get over Asgard's magic."

This piqued Loki's curiosity even further, and he popped back in sight. "You do not have magic where you are from?" He watched the man shake his head. "If you tell me more, perhaps I can show you my craft?"

A deal was struck.

Loki decided that even without knowing much about his father's friend, he likes him anyways.

Left alone once more, the Doctor leaned back in his chair and tilted his head toward his oldest companion. The vision of the child did not escape his mind. "I see, so that's why."

-(/)-

Loki spoke the passcode. The door opened, and then closed behind him. In the middle of the almost entirely white room, a large book was propped up on a spiraling black stand. The pages were blank and empty.

Earlier, the mischievous child had to pry himself away from the Doctor. The man expressed his weariness of recent travels, but would gladly carry on a discussion the next days to come. With so many questions to enquire, Loki felt the need to prepare himself. Thus he toted himself to his favorite place: the library. More specifically, the library's archive room.

"Archive," Loki commanded in a princely voice, "give me information on the individual known as the "Doctor." What is his true name?"

Color began to seep into the no longer white pages. Nine individuals materialized, and the child only recognized the last one.

"Real name unknown," the voice stemmed from the book as text appeared simultaneously. "The man is only known as the Doctor."

"Who are these men?"

"The Doctor."

"They cannot all be the Doctor. Is the title  _Doctor_  a namesake?"

"They all are the Doctor."

Loki growled in frustration. "Fine. Does the Doctor have any unique abilities? Where does this man originate from?"

"The Doctor has the ability to regenerate. He hails from the planet Gallifrey. Species: Time Lord."

A wide eyed Loki stood there in shock. This little jackpot was greater than the time he tricked Thor to wearing their mother's dress! "Tell me everything about Gallifrey, the Time Lords, and the Doctor."

"The Doctor travels through time in a blue box known as the TARDIS. No other information available."

Loki rubbed his temple as he exited the room. So much for jackpot. Still, it was enough for him to base his questions off of.

-(/)-

Loki skipped all lessons to lay lazily on the Doctor's bed. He propped up his feet atop a mound of pillows as he watched the Doctor tinker away. His eyesight drifted to the man's formidable ears to the humming blue box. Many,  _many_ questions swirled inside Loki's mind. In the end, he decided to pursue knowledge from the Doctor similar to how he learned spells: start with the basics.

"What is your name?"

"The Doctor. Or just Doctor, if you like."

"But your  _real_ name. The one your parents gave you."

"Next question, Odinson."

Loki huffed. One does not simply brush off a  _prince._  He dug feet in the pillows, hoping the man enjoyed the smell of whatever he walked in. He clicked his tongue, the next question rolling of easily.

"How old are you?"

"I suppose I'll be hitting my ninth century soon. I expect a cake. Or perhaps banana pudding. Imagine, fitting 900 candles in pudding?"

Did he regenerate after a certain length of time, or perhaps… Before he had a chance to voice the query, the Doctor cracked his knuckles.

"Tell me more about magic," the Doctor said without looking up from his desk.

"Such as?"

"Assume I know nothing."

Loki sighed. He breathed in deeply, thinking back to his previous mentor—before insanity struck him.

"Each person's core holds the ability to use magic. You can manipulate what is inside or what strands of magic are in the air. It takes many hours of training and practicing the right sequence of words. A true master sorcerer, however, can yield magic without words."

"Sounds useful. From the looks of things, most Asgardians don't practice magic."

"Hah!" His bark of laughter was equal parts bitter, devious, and humor. "The variables are many. The amount in your core, the access to it, your mind… More oft than not, it depends on how willing the individual. As you can see, my culture is built on the strength of muscle and blades."

The sheets were gripped tightly in his hands as Loki thought about his mentor.

"Magic is tricky subject; it will destroy those of the weaker mind."

-(/)-

Loki idly watched the Doctor tinker with wires and gadgets. The intense focus on the man's face expressed such compassion for this machine, this blue box. It had been a month since the crash the brought the Doctor tumbling to the palace walls, a month of skipped meals and long nights in favor of the Doctor's company. Tonight, however, seemed important to the Doctor, as if he were on the verge of fixing whatever needed to be fixed.

The hum of the sonic screwdriver filled the lofty room. Once more, Loki felt drawn to the TARDIS.

_TARDIS,_ he repeated to himself,  _that's what the Doctor calls her. Time And Relative…_

Oh, how jealous Thor would be if he were to know. The child's hand patted the blue wood.

"What lies beyond Asgard?" Loki whispered. If the question was directed to the machine or the Doctor, Loki knew not. "What worlds and realms are amidst the stars?"

"Countless, more than you can possibly imagine. In the future, planets and cultures will interlock and mingle. Enemies will become friends; some allies will turn against each other. Nature of the beast, I suppose. It's all truly fantastic."

The night lingered on. The Doctor spun tales of his travels. Loki slumped on the Doctor's bed, vaguely noting that hadn't been tidied up since his last stay. His words were sweet honey on Loki's ears, lulling him into a comfortable night's rest. He dreamed of exploring the stars with the Doctor.

Humming from the TARDIS and Loki's soft snores accompanied the Doctor through the night.

-(/)-

They were both outside, perched comfortably atop the balcony from the Doctor's room. The man laid himself out on what he called a beach chair, and Loki hadn't a clue where it came from. Still, the man managed to reason with him, and Loki found himself lying languidly in the shade.

"How did you meet my father?" Loki tilted his head to look at the man next to him.

"Through a friend of a friend," the Doctor answered vaguely. "Meeting so many new people, it becomes a chore to keep track."

The relentless sun bore through the clouds. Loki pondered if he should learn magic that controlled the weather. No sweat was visible on the Doctor's skin, and he seemed to be enjoying the sun. Loki fanned himself desperately.

"I would imagine so, being a Time Lord."

The Doctor quirked an eyebrow. "When did the clever boy figure this out?" He chuckled at the silence. "Perhaps the magician will give away some other secrets?"

Loki smirked. "Perhaps, perhaps. Yet I find your answer to be vague and secretive. Surely knowledge of the Mystic Arts is worth a few more words."

In the hot breeze of Asgard's summer, the Doctor's words were dark and offered little comfort.

"Through war," he said without a trace of former humor.

Words bring power to incantations and magic. They were just as deadly in the hands of a man who possessed no such abilities. If the Doctor spoke the whole truth, the answer would surely squander any hope.

Those simple words brought an end to the exchange of words between the Doctor and Loki; their little game. The Doctor's gazed stretched out to Asgard, and did not see the devious smirk planted on Loki's face. If one game ended, he would simply start another.

-(/)-

Time etched on as the pranks between the Doctor and Loki grew. Rarely did they exchange knowledge, but Loki found this just as enjoyable.

One morning, Loki awoke to Thor's rambunctious laughter. Very peculiar considering he fell asleep in the Doctor's chambers.

"Brother, your hair! Tis the color of the sky!"

Loki knew to blame the Doctor. He returned the favor spiking the Doctor's drink. For the first time, the child got to see a sleeping Time Lord. He resisted the humming TARDIS, fearing the Doctor's disapproving gaze. If he entered unwanted, without permission, would it be betrayal? Loki opted to stay awake, occasionally singing a soft lullaby beneath his breath.

-(/)-

Autumn wind rolled through Asgard, whistling outside the Doctor's window. He pressed his hands against the glass, admiring the cooler seasons of this planet. The cooler weather never stayed long, but he learned to savor the sweetness of such things. The door to his room opened behind, and the Doctor did not turn. By the sound of the loud footsteps, the individual was not Loki and could therefore wait.

Peace on one's birthday should not be too much to ask for.

He admired the Queen for skipping to the point, bypassing any regal formality.

"He is not one for you to sweep off in one of your adventures, Doctor. Take sail back to Midgard, entertain a mortal, but  _do not_ taint my son."

He spun on his heels to meet her stare. "A son you did not  _birth_?"

"He is my son! Blood matters not."

Any sense of cruelty left the Doctor's face, and offered an apologetic smile. "I don't take children with me," he said softly.

His words did nothing to satisfy her. "We are all children to you," Frigga stated simply. "Even my husband, countless ages older, and still a child before the Doctor." She circled his still form. "How are old are you truly? You wear a new skin. Did you lose your old one in battle? Before it, perhaps?"

"You ask too much." He took in a calming breath. "I will not take your child on any  _adventures_. I promise. Now please leave. I won't stay longer than needed. I know your husband can't be too thrilled with someone he fought against living in his quarters."

She placed a warm hand on his shoulder. "In the end, you did what was right. My king cannot fault you for what Laufey did to you." She went to make her leave and paused at the door. "We are at peace with Jotunheim now. Of all of us, you desired it most."

-(/)-

The day began like the others.

Loki skipped breakfast and found the Doctor, who this time appeared in the garden. It was a strange sight, the Doctor munching on an apple nonchalantly. In the daylight hour, he looked almost normal. The Doctor tossed Loki an apple before carrying on a conversation with one his mother's blushing maidens.

The two adults stayed near the rose bushes while Loki stayed beneath the shade of towering tree.

Loki observed the two talking and felt a pinged of jealousy. It never occurred to him before now that the Doctor perhaps also enjoyed the company of others. The child bit harshly, the juice of the apple dripping down his lips. He quieted all senses minus his hearing.

"My Queen would also like to remind you of last night's words."

With a curtsy, the maiden left.

The Doctor turned to the scowling child. "It seems my stay is becoming unwelcomed." He took a bite of his apple. "It's a shame you do not have bananas. Come, I'm off to the market square today."

Loki's eyebrows receded to his hairline at the thought of the Doctor interacting with the masses of Asgard. Accompanied with his appearance, his manner of speech differed. Loki attributed it to the man's travels and home planet. Perhaps the prince would sound just as odd among new cultures. He toyed with the idea of traveling the worlds, but kept that dream at bay. Royalty came with certain duties, traveling and adventures were out of question, at least in the same manner as the Doctor.

He walked beside the Doctor and asked him of his journeys. The autumn breeze shifted, blowing through Loki's ebony locks. He appeared as a china doll next to his ruffian companion. The Doctor moved his limbs animatedly as he described the tale of fifty feet tale giants who lost an eye contact. Needless to say, it was up to the Doctor to locate it else an interplanetary war might've occurred.

Throughout the day in the dark corners of the market, among the gawks and stares, Loki's brain told him that this day wouldn't end like the others. He didn't fully believe until he sat down at the dining table next to the Doctor.

Loki sat beside the man, an inch closer than normal—not that anyone noticed. So accustomed now to listening to the man speak, it felt odd to sit beside him and hardly hear a word.

Queen Frigga sipped honey-wine from her jeweled chalice. "I see it takes three seasons for our esteemed guest to join us. Even back in the old days with that absurd scarf, you still showed up for a decent meal."

Finishing a swig of mead, King Odin patted his wife's hand. "Now dear, we must let our friend repair his ship." He chuckled and perked a brow. "I also hear you have been entertaining one of my sons."

"Yes," included Frigga, "the little stint in the market place reached my ears as well. Was it truly necessary to string all of Helge's jewelry from one end of the Smithery to the other?" She swatted away her husband, and her glare ceased his laughter.

In truth, she loved her son and felt reassured that he found someone to connect with now that Thor's time was spent with the Warriors Three. She knew the Doctor, his power of words and actions, both in stories and first hand. She had witnessed the results of his actions during the war against Jotunheim, how her men returned nearly ready for Valhalla. But the war would have been much worse if it won't for his reasoning, bargaining, and stubbornness to end the tragedy with the least blood spilled. In the end, peace was made thanks to him.

She won't lose her son to the danger that follows his footsteps.

"I thought it to be a fine display of her overpriced wares," responded the Doctor without a hint of guilt on display. He smiled at his partner in crime, and Loki reveled in their private joke.

Thor merely darted his attention between the trouble makers. What came out was not the sweet jealousy that Loki yearned for. "I did not know you and the Doctor were good friends, Brother!" He raised his mug of watered down mead. "A toast!"

Everyone else at the table raised their glasses, mugs, and chalices in agreement. Hesitantly, Loki followed the Doctor's actions.

"To a fantastic companion!"

The Doctor's words rang through the room like a beautiful echo. No one noticed how still the queen became for she knew the consequences behind that word. It meant death, tragedy, being left behind.

_Companion._

The table reverberated when Odin slammed his mug on the table after finishing off its contents. He let out a loud belch, and the Doctor could see the mental high five between Odin and Thor. "Let me tell you about the Doctor," he said finally to all the silent on-lookers. He grinned widely, showing no malice in his words to follow. "I have fought against this man."

Loki stilled.  _They met through war._  He remained silent and picked at his meet, unable to look anyone in the eyes.

"In the land of eternal Winter, amongst towering monsters, this man stood above them all. Fire! Ice!" The great king slammed his palm against the table for emphasis. "The man who does not belong to the Nine Realms was the best Jotunheim offered to our warriors! His actions were swift and his words deadly." He dramatically leaned forward. His alcohol ridden breath swooped across the table, and Loki wished for silence. "In fact, I believe that even the Terrible Jotun King Laufey feared him."

Feared him.  _Twisted_ him.

"My friend," the Doctor interjected, nearly hissed. Odin halted his speech. "Do not continue, 'lest you wish to bare the truth for your subjects to hear as well."

Let it not be said that Odin was an unwise man. Let it not be said he could not cut down without a keen blade. Let it not be said Odin forgave  _and forgot_.

"Oh good friend o' mine, how fairs the Time War?"

In all his life, Loki has never felt as cold as he did now as if the Doctor radiated ice. He instinctively scooted away in his seat.

"What's the Time War?" whispered Thor.

"A war between the two of the oldest races in all the universes, existing before Yggridsil itself—the Daleks and the Time Lords," Odin explained in the voice often used to convey his tales of battle. "They say Daleks only know hatred and anger, a need to control and destroy. Fear comes in the form of the Doctor, the Oncoming Storm!"

All eyes settled on the man. Loki's heart thudded erratically beneath his chest, threatening to burst out. In all the days spent together, the long hours and talks, the man did not give off the same battle ready aura common as the sun in Asgard. A frown marred his princely face. Perhaps he was wrong. Perhaps he deluded himself into thinking he found a kindred spirit.

The Doctor set down his utensils and stared directly as his plate. "The Last Great Time War is over. You house the last of the Time Lords." Beside him, Loki could feel the man shaking. "But no longer."

He left.

Loki started to stand, but Frigga's tight grip held her child in place. The king returned to dinner and everyone followed suit in silence.

Later that night, Loki snuck to the Doctor's room. All of the gizmos and wires were gone, including the TARDIS.

-(/)-

A month passed without word from the Doctor. Frigga assured her son that this was normal, that the Doctor always leaves. Loki wished to hear none of it. Each night he gazed out at the stars, aching for the Doctor. Their games of questions and few answers left him wanting. No one in Asgard could stimulate his thirst for knowledge or hunger for mystery.

One night, he discovered a blue letter lying on his pillowcase.

_Care to see the stars? Tomorrow at midnight, the old room.  
~D_

-(/)-

The blue box awaited him.

The man opened the door, offering his hand.

The prince grasped the hand and stepped inside the TARDIS.

"By the treasure of Aegir, she is bigger on the inside," he whispered.

"Quite right."

-(/)-

The constant twirl of the cosmos, twisting and forever expanding. Maroon, violets, and blues. Some colors that Loki had witnessed for the first time. A soft breath escaped his lips in amazement. A new galaxy was being born. New planets. New life. _This is old_ , he reminded himself. Being sped up in front of his very eyes, the child observed the birth of his planet.

The Doctor babbled. Something about an air locked shield around the TARDIS. The words drifted around Loki but he didn't hear. For a long time, the child could only watch. Silence fell, and the Doctor joined.

Loki's hand reached out, spreading his fingers into the vacuum. Desolate. Alone. Empty.

And yet so full with life and mystery. What curious creatures, Time and Space.

"Listen well, Loki," the man said at last. The child's ears perked. "War is a wretched beast. It tears apart civilizations and ruptures families. Avoid it whenever possible."

_You speak from experience, Doctor?_

Loki scoffed. "War is inevitable. My people are barbarians choking on their own muscles. They crave adrenaline, the glory. War is the blood in their veins. They cease existing without battle."

_My brother seeks nothing more than to join their ranks._

"Then it is important for you to become King, Loki. End battles swiftly with the least bloodshed." The Doctor patted him on the shoulder. "You're a clever boy. The cleverest, almost."

"Almost?"

"Not to brag, but I was cleverer."

_Is that how you survived?_

"Hah."

The moment pushed once more into the quietness of space. The two beings most skilled at speech kept silent and watched from their blue box.

"I will become king," Loki spoke at last to the person beside him. This man, his idol, the Doctor, so different from others; so curious to learn and explore. For the Doctor's sake, he will become king. "I swear on my honor, on these stars, I will attain the crown and lead my people."

For the first time, Loki saw the most brilliant smile on the Doctor.

_Do you not know how much that smile is worth, Doctor?_

Night crawled on, and the Doctor finally convinced Loki of their need to return to Asgard. He held the tired boy in his arms. The prince looked so tiny, almost like an average earth child who stayed awake far too long. Loki clutched the fabric of the Doctor's shirt.

"You've been to the future," Loki said, "am I great?"

"I do not follow the history of Jotunheim and Asgard as part of the truce," the Doctor explained softly.

They exited the TARDIS and went onto the balcony connected to Loki and Thor's bedchambers. If he were more alert, Loki would marvel at the stars, of how he witnessed their beginnings.

"You will return, will you not?"

The Doctor shifted the child in his arms in order to open the door properly. Once inside, the Doctor whispered. "One must celebrate with the new king, after all."

The green in Loki's eyes become brighter. "Will you visit before then?"

"Perhaps." The Doctor gently set Loki on the bed. Loki's grip did not leave the Doctor's shirt. "I promise."

"A vow," he whispers almost to himself, "in the midst of stars to a mad man in box."

"Yes, I suppose life is funny."

The Doctor shouldn't make promises he can't keep. 


	2. Returning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For the Doctor Who timeline, this takes place in Series 4. For the Thor timeline, this takes place after the movie. Behold, Loki meeting the 10th Doctor!

In the Midst of Liars

Donna's mind slipped away the same moment that Loki slipped into the darkness.

Leaving the Ood, the Doctor thought he can make it in time for the coronation—hopefully for his favorite sorcerer. He knew Loki would be extremely cross with his absence, but the Doctor was sure he could dazzle the prince.

  
**Chapter Two:** Returning

He remembered very little of the void. But it was cold, bare, and  _dark_. He could close his pale eyes without any difference to behold. The goosebumps along his skin became his companions, and he contemplated naming them. No moon, sun, or stars left him without any sense of time. He allowed a tear, only one.

His vow, now shattered, meant nothing in resolute darkness.

Then came that beautiful sound; the  _weewoo_ of mechanics that signaled the Doctor's arrival and departure. The sudden light blinded Loki, he cannot see. But he can  _feel_ the firm grip of the Doctor's strength pulling him in. The child locked inside fondly recalls the first instance of palms together, ready to venture off. Loki let sleep take him, for surely this must be a dream.

-(/)-

The Doctor held Loki like a child in his lap. He curled his arms across Loki's chest and let the fallen prince rest in comfortable silence. Neither felt the need to speak, for one truth was certain in the presence of these liars. They have experienced loss. Neither knows the fullest extent of the other's, and they were content with not knowing too many secrets.

The God of Mischief. The spinner of lies has been lied to. A part of Loki told him it was apt punishment. How worthless in the one eye of his false-father rang clear in bitter truth. No matter how hard he tried, no matter how cunningly he planned, the results lashed back fiercely. Here he sat, fallen and lost, in the arms of his idol. He tightly closed his eyes, unable to comprehend _why_ the Doctor held him thusly for surely he did not deserve it.

Loki breathed in.

_I have failed in my vow amongst the stars._

The last of the Time Lords. Time and time again, the Doctor brings chaos in his wake. Does he find it? Or does chaos exist solely for him? His companion death silently, and always, steps out of the TARDIS with him. Whether through death or his own actions, the Doctor is left alone. Rose; trapped in a parallel world. Martha; left broken. Donna; made so strong only to have everything stricken from her memory. The Doctor forwent the urge to cradle the child in his arms, wishing to change the course of events.

In the end, the Doctor could not save another companion. Broken like the rest, in the end.

Loki stirred. He wiped his green eyes and licked his dry lips.

"My thanks, Doctor, for saving me."

The Doctor's two hearts stopped. Maybe, just maybe, he can reverse his actions.

_I will save you._

-(/)-

Putting the warm liquid to his lips, Loki wondered how many people have the Doctor has made tea for. It was a silly contemplation, far more shallow than his typical ponderings. He added several spoonfuls of sugar, deciding these thoughts were better than previous dark dwellings. Twirling his spoon, he glanced up as the Doctor sat down across from him at the table. He let his thoughts slip over to the new form of the Doctor, green eyes raking over the lanky body and messy hair.

"You have sideburns now," Loki stated.

"I see your eyes haven't worsened from the pitch blackness."

"What happened?"

The Doctor chuckled, lounged back, and planted his bare feet on the table. "Back to playing that game, are we?"

Loki swallowed, internally debating if it were wise to play the game now. What information would the Doctor ask for in exchange? Fear was temporally forgotten when the Doctor carried on talking.

"I suppose you can say that I changed for a girl. Is that as common on Asgard as it is Earth?"

His breath evened out. Good, good. He can handle a simple question. "I would not know. The women of Asgard have not been able to hold my interest in the manner you refer to." He closed his eyes and concentrated. He reached inside his core and weaved what magic he could manage. Although it was more difficult due it being sapped away thanks to the void, Loki succeeded. He opened his eyes, and allowed his lips to curve deviously at the sight of the Doctor's gaping mouth. "I suppose you can say it is easy for me to change."

Loki still wore the loose black shirt and slacks, yet the Doctor tried very hard not to notice the now very,  _very_  feminine Loki wasn't wearing a bra. Instead he focused on Loki's even greener eyes and long lashes. He tugged on his collar. "Soo, you've improved your magic. Any chance you can make me a ginger?"

Womanly laughter came from Loki's full lips before contorting to a velvety chuckle. In a matter of seconds, Loki transformed back into masculinity. "I think I would prefer getting use to this Doctor before I have you changing on me."

"Keeping people on their toes is what I do best."

"That it is." The question of who the woman is or was popped to mind, but Loki pushed it back. He could see the way the Doctor held himself, the way his eyes seemed a tad darker. Oh, this woman was important, but gone now. He made a gesture of looking around. "Anywhere in time and space? Where shall we venture to?"

_Please, not Midgard._

The Doctor smiled. "Oh, of all the planets and galaxies, I'm sure we can manage something."

_Anywhere but Earth._

The urge to beg for forgiveness stirred so strongly in the two men for both had failed the other. Instead they quietly sipped their tea in the gentle hum of the TARDIS. Watching Loki grip firmly the cup's handle, the Doctor sees the little boy he once knew. If he had showed up sooner, how different would the god before him be?

"Once we patch you up, I know this lovely planet, potentially lethal radiation aside. Has a brilliant waterfall, made of sapphires. It's called Midnight."

Unlike his previous stay, the Doctor plans to  _stay_  at the resort—possibly years into the future when the staff has forgotten about a funny man called the Doctor. What the people didn't know, was that civilization was possible on Midnight. In fact, he visited them a few times after the quarrel between Joutenheim and Asgard. Perhaps he should give them a visit, and see if he could figure out when the radiation became a problem.

-(/)-

Many nights passed without being closer to what the Doctor has deemed "patched up." Loki spent his nights in a spare room of the TARDIS, staring up at the ceiling. Sleep eluded him until morning hours arrive. Thor and Odin are trapped inside his mind. These people he loved; called family. All a lie.

"Doctor," he said softly.

Cast aside from the Bifrost, from Asgard, only the Doctor came.

When the Doctor left him after the night spent in the stars, Loki thought that surely the Doctor forgot about him. Decades piled atop centuries without word or hint of the Time Lord's next arrival. Loki learned to steady his heart and make peace with his brother's shadows. For surely the Doctor would be proud once the crown rested on Loki's head. For surely he would arrive, and perhaps even be made part of Loki's council.

He never came.

Not until it was too late.

Not until the darkness scraped his mind and the void ripped his soul.

_He left me to drown._

Loki gripped the sheets and pushed the wretched thought aside. The Doctor showed him kindness as young child, showed him that not everyone needed brawn. The Doctor gave him friendship and purpose.

_He saved me._

He pulled the pillow close. In a manner undignified for a prince, Loki tightly wrapped his arms around the pillow. Doing his best to think happy thoughts, he fell asleep. His dreams were bitter and dark, filled with such loneliness it made the TARDIS want to weep.

The Doctor's ears perked when the hum of the TARDIS changed. If he didn't know any better, he'd say she was singing a lullaby.

-(/)-

The Doctor pulled a lever a twisted a few knobs. They're destination was Midnight, before the resort, and an eon before radiation settled in. If he remembered correctly, they were a very welcoming people.

Loki tapped his foot impatiently at the door, waiting for the Doctor who was still hunched over at the mechanics. The man pushed up his glasses in concentration. Loki clicked his tongue and walked over there. His hair has grown longer, and it slides down as he leans over the Doctor. The god's eyes sweep over the numbers and letters that Doctor focused on.

"You hardly focus on the specifics. What ails you?"

The Doctor gave him the charming smile that maddened Loki. "Just making sure it's not the year with high radiation."

Despite knowing it's only a half-truth, Loki let the smile calm him. After all, the God of Mischief can't let all lies bother him.

The Doctor stood, almost colliding with his companion if it weren't Loki's quick foot work. The Doctor mentally chided himself, and then stopped. Maybe referring to Loki as a companion was good. Maybe it'll help ease his loneliness. The Doctor adjusted his jacket, grabbed Loki by the hand, and headed out the door.

"Welcome," the Doctor said, "to Crystal Paradise. I believe this city is called Hope's Beacon…. Blimey."

Once, pillars of crystal stood tall. They shined amongst rays of light, and the colors danced. No longer. Now the pillars and towers have fallen, debris everywhere. In the midst of trying to describe the former beauty, a scream interrupted the Doctor. The nasty sound rivaled the pitch of an angry Odin, and would have sent lesser beings running.

The two froze and searched for the source of the noise.

"I sense a presence, but my eyes do not see it." For a moment, he thought he saw something in the distance, but Loki turned back to the Doctor. "Is this presence friend or foe?"

"An unknown species. I last encountered it on the future of this planet. It learns by copying others, but it got out of hand. Keep your wits about."

"Do I ever stop?"

-(/)-

The ruins of the nameless civilization yielded no answers. The Doctor grabbed a picnic basket from the TARDIS.

They leaned on a thick ash tree beneath a blanket of stars. A dagger in hand, Loki carved his apple. The Doctor seemed somewhere off in thought, in place that Loki couldn't possibly reach him.

"There's a prophecy," he finally said, his mouth dry and voice cracked.

"There are many," replied Loki, curious to see where this is leading. "I'm supposed to start Ragnarok. In the emptiness of space, in the hellish void, I witnessed part of my past-lives. Not much, only to see the destruction of the worlds at my hands." He paused and hung his head. "My apologies, Doctor. I did not mean to pour that out when you had something to say."

The Doctor took Loki's dagger and apple, setting them on the grass. He scooted closer and wrapped an arm across Loki's shoulders.

"Hey, what are friends for if they can't stop each other from destroying the universe?"

Loki kept his focus on the dewy grass. "You mean it, Doctor? You will stop me?"

"I'm pretty good at accomplishing the impossible."

The warmth of the Doctor's body and words did nothing.

"And if the world ends despite your effort? If I wish it to end, Doctor? If I wish to wage war across the stars and galaxies, and bring the universe to its knees?"

"Then I'll reboot it," he said simply. "Destroying galaxies? Gods sure know how relieve stress."

Loki chuckled, a slight grin brightening his features. "When I become king, there will be a place for you by my side." He imagined a kingdom, grand and  _his_ , and the Doctor close by. Perhaps, for a time, he will delay siege against Asgard—if only for the Doctor's sake. "What did your prophesy speak of?"

The Doctor's arm slid off Loki's shoulders. His fingers intercrossed together, and he let out a long breath.

"He will knock four times and I will die. I headed towards Asgard to find a way to escape death," he admitted. "Where I go, Death follows. People, innocent people, die wherever I go. Perhaps she has been chasing me, and has finally caught up."

"I believe the solution is simple: regenerate. Is that not what Time Lords do, cast off old skins and wear new ones?"

"It's not like a sunburn. I will no longer be me. Well, I'll still be me, but it's a new me. Not only a new skin, so to speak, but a new personality. I still have so much to do as  _this me_ : people to save, worlds to see, laws of physics to break."

The question bubbled out without warning. "When you regenerated to this form, what happened with you and the girl? You said you changed for her, I mean. Did she stay?"

"Do you really want to play our game, Loki?" The god nodded, and the Doctor sighed. "Battle happened," he said solemnly. "Everyone was dying, and so she looked into the TARDIS. She saved everyone, but playing god, tampering with the raw power of Time and Space, comes with consequences. It was far, far too much for her human mind. I saved her, became this in the process." He stretched his arm, his hand above him in the stars. "She's out there, trapped in another dimension that I can't reached."

A twinge of jealousy coursed through Loki, and he knew it was wrong for him to feel it. But the Doctor was his, Loki laid claim long before any mortal woman, long before he knew his own intent. The Doctor was more than Loki's idol or friend. Everyone else may have been lost, but the Doctor will remain  _his._  To see the pain in the Doctor, to know a mortal was the chief cause of it, burning anger quickly replaced jealousy.

His fingers danced in the cold air. Leaves fell from the tree and swirled in the wind. They burst into tiny balls of shimmering light. Loki watched contently as peace washed over the Doctor, no matter how brief.

Shadows flickered in the background, catching the corner of Loki's eye.

-(/)-

Loki crept out during the middle of the night, the Doctor presumably asleep. He wondered if that man ever sleeps, but last Loki checked the Doctor was holed away in his room. He cast the Doctor from his thoughts.

A creature without name or face, lurking in the shadows. The only spotlight received was when plucked from others. This is the only information that he could gather from the Doctor, as he kept mostly silent on his prior experience.

"Oh damnable creature," Loki called softly to the wind, "I understand."

A sharp hiss pierced the wind.

"Can you speak, creature? I wish no harm upon you."

He let the magic pour from his fingertips and blew gently to the direction of the noise.

A swirling shape of green mist formed.

For a long, long time, Loki could only stare.

"Who… who did this to you?"

He swallowed.

_A citizen of the planet, now deformed and twisted until you forgotten what you once were._

There was no form, just a mass of green. It needed substance. It shifted toward Loki, and he stuck a slender finger into the mist. Oh, it was dangerous, but what had he to lose?

It densed and contorted until it took the shape of a man. It shrieked and cried at the sudden consciousnesses.

It could not speak, but its thoughts shrieked so loudly into Loki.

_.Gone. It came. The Darkness. The Dark One, The Destroyer of Our Worlds, he took from us. Everything gone. Everything forgotten._

_We didn't bow. He took. He took our home. He wants wants wants wants._

_Please. You'll make it go away?_

_You'll make the monster go away?_

So entranced by the helplessness of the creature, Loki did not notice the shadow behind them.

-(/)-

His voice was cold, and the smell of rot was clear in the vast darkness space.

"His magic is great, sire. Laufeyson will be useful in our plans. With the right persuasion, a deal can be brought."

His master gave a curt nod.

"Be wary of the one he travels with. I do not wish to court the Doctor without greater forces."

-(/)-

"I have been watching you, observing you, seeing if you are worthy to wield what my master can bestow upon you."

Temptation reeled through Loki like a purring feline. To think of what he could do with such a thing…

"Your master is the one who made this kingdom barren, correct?"

"Correct."

The Doctor was not there to cry out injustice, and Loki could only imagine what Asgard would look like once he brought the betrayers to their knees. He thought of Midgard, his brother's precious planet, the one also beloved by the Doctor. He had to change for a mortal. Chances are that the Doctor's prophecy would be fulfilled by a mortal. That filthy planet deserved to feel his recompense.

Everything burning. Flames cascading the landscape, smoke clogging the lungs of the insignificant.

Loki felt anew, given purpose.

In the darkness, a deal was struck.

-(/)-

The walls of the forgotten barely stood. Chunks and shards of icy green and pink crystal was scattered among the rubble ground. Only one stained glass window remained fully intact—slithering snake circling a budding flower.

A chill settled in the pit of his stomach, and Loki took delight in it as he strutted in the room, high on power.

The entirety of the heart was laid out before him: goals, dreams, and nightmares. All the clinks and clogs that made the person whole, available for him to manipulate and exploit. One word and they  _submit_.

Loki licked his lips at such grand power. The nameless man stood before him, eyes lifeless and ice blue. Loki's grin stretched his maddeningly as he delved deeper into the stranger's psyche.

Everything shifted and contorted until Loki no longer stood in abandoned rubble. He lifted his arms amongst the cosmos of the stranger's mind. He rolled around in memories, passing thoughts, and hidden desires. What power. What control!

He closed his eyes.

Just how far can he go?

He crawled through the mortal's memories, pushing further and further until he saw through the eyes of a toddler. Such primitive thoughts. Was he like this once before? Was the Doctor? He pulled out from the cosmos of the mind, snapping back to reality.

The man lied in a heap. Loki kicked the man and barked an order to kneel before his new ruler. The man did not budge.

"Kneel!"

The man was broken, the price paid for a shattered mind.

"He is too far gone for control. " The cold voice sucked the air from behind Loki. "Delve too far, bend too much, and you will break them. You need subjects with  _heart._ Fear not, we have others."

Loki hefted the man and threw him out the window. Glass crashed to the grown, the budding flower no more. Only the snake remained.

-(/)-

The Doctor thought nothing odd on Loki's persistence of staying. No matter how fruitless their endeavors were, Loki kept talking him into staying another night. The mystery of the fallen palace and invisible creatures were enough to drive his own nagging curiosity. Something just didn't seem  _right_. To deny the feeling in his guts wouldn't prove wise. Besides, seeing his companion happy and seeking out a mystery, well, it warmed the Doctor's hearts.

He promptly knocked on Loki's bedroom door.

"I know you said it's dangerous to venture out at night, but what's life without a little dodging death? Loki…?"

He knocked again without answer. On one hand, he didn't want to intrude on Loki's privacy. On the other, the god might be hurt. The Doctor broke in using his sonic screwdriver, and found Loki's room barren.

He went back to the controls and scanned for Loki's signature on the TARDIS. She beeped at him.

"Now, now, just 'cause the Trickster God is gone doesn't mean this a bad thing." He bit his lip. "No reason to panic."

The Doctor grabbed his coat and exited the TARDIS.

-(/)-

Power and pleasure coexisted, intermingled until they became one.

_We can give you the power than your Doctor cannot._

The shivering mess of a mortal quivered beneath him. How appeasing the worm looked at his boots.

The scepter's power seeped inside and rolled around into his core.

_The Doctor left you._

He kicked the obedient servant, and pressed down on its chest. How far can he hurt it before it retaliates? Will it fight back?

_He spent his many years with foolish mortals._

It does not occur to him, that shapeless creature he once sought used to be similar to one he took his rage upon. A grin erupted on his face when the creature only whimpers from beatings.

_Never once did he visit._

He commanded it to kneel. It complied.

_Never once did you hear from him._

_He will only leave you again._

_But you can make him stay._

-(/)-

The doors swung open, clashing against the rocky walls.

The Doctor stood in front of him, eerily quiet with a backdrop of night stars. Anyone who has been around the Doctor for less than minute would know this wasn't normal. A friend would question his health. A knowledgeable enemy of sound mind would be running. And yet, Loki knew he could handle whatever danger the Doctor brought.

Loki circled the man, his body tight with subdued anger. "You," he breathed, the one syllable escaped his tongue like fire. "You left me. You said you would return, and you left me with people who despised me."

Oh, the verge of breaking. How many times has the Doctor witnessed this? Failed to stop it?

Inches apart, Loki tilted his head until their noses nearly touched. "Why?" He took a step back and snarled, face contorting to animalistic rage. "ANSWER ME!"

Saving the world, parallel dimensions, paradoxes…

The Doctor could not find an acceptable answer. Equipped with a time machine, he should have saved Loki before this mess started.

"I'm so, so sorry."

Loki laughed. "The great Doctor, master of words and lies, cannot yield a fathomable excuse?"

"I should have been there. I—"

He placed a pale finger on the Doctor's lips. "Shh. You left… never again." Before the Doctor had a chance to respond, Loki pressed the scepter's tip firmly on the Doctor's chest. "What a glorious heart you must possess."

And like that, the world went pitch black.

Unlike before, a blue string twirled around the Doctor and Loki amongst the cosmos. Loki reached out and grabbed it.

 _It unveils your connection,_ the power told him.

Stars flew pass the duo as Loki followed the path laid before him.

" _Loki,_ wait just a moment and think about what you're doing!"

"Silence."

-(/)-

Their conversation outside, beneath the tree.

Beneath the tree again, except Loki is looking at their past selves, and he feels so much more. There's so much  _pain_. For a brief moment, an image of a blonde mortal woman flits across the ethereal realm. Ah, so she is the woman he changed for.

And he sees these funny Ood creatures, and hears the foretelling and the knocking, over and over and over. Enough to drive anyone mad.

Except, maybe a part of him already is.

….

He's in space again. So dark, and empty, and cold. Except Loki is not Loki, he is the Doctor.

The Doctor who is on his way, not to Loki, but to the wisdom of Asgard. He seeks the knowledge and truth of divinities, if there is way to halt such things.

He sees Loki, more like, the TARDIS  _feels_ Loki, and tells the Doctor.

There is a stillness in his chest. At that moment, Loki knows the Doctor wields two hearts, and their beat has stopped.

….

The string keeps going and going, and Loki sees what has missed.

The mortal woman made of fire and brimstone, who burned with such a ferocity that shined brilliantly for a single, glorious moment.

The woman, a child in Loki's eyes, who walked the earth in the year that never came to pass.

And then it's her, the blonde woman. Such sadness, and pain, and longing. And Loki sees her, breath full of the TARDIS, and it pains him to see his Doctor take it in. Loki wants to reach out, grab the wretch by her throat, and let her puny mortal body wither and die.

The Doctor leaves them all.

The string continues.

….

He's a kid again, making some silly promise.

There's no going back now that he's broken such a thing.

A child's prayer.

….

They're in the hallway now, meeting at each other for what Loki thinks to be the first time.

Familiarity brews inside the Doctor, and current-Loki questions it, for the Doctor looks as if he's seen a ghost.

Then Loki sees it, the string that still continues.

….

Further and further into the cosmos, it takes the Doctor all his strength to block out the Time War.

There is fire upon Loki skin, and the stench of rot in his nose. He lets the Doctor push him away, for why is the string still unraveling?

He wills the cosmos to shift until he meets the end, bypassing whatever years of the Doctor came after.

….

The golden gleam of Asgard's Queen shines through the desolate Winter, a part of the tale that King omits. Her touch is that of grace and life, doing her best to heal the wounded.

He is standing, a circle of fallen warriors at his feet. This man so feared, so despised, weeps.

She places long, soft fingers to his face and releases him from Laufey's bondage.

The Doctors runs, as is what he does best. Frigga tends to fallen, and is thankful they're still alive.

Loki pressed the current Doctor for knowledge.

Why? Why? Why?

How did he become Laufey's servant?

The man is running though, a long scarf trailing behind him. Always running, running, running.

There's a child in his arms now, bluer than any sapphire. A child he's been trying to keep alive since this cursed thing began. He cradles the child, the jewel among the blood, the light that kept him from giving up.

The large, beastly form of Odin shadows over them, but there is softness to his voice.

The scene melts as the Doctor pushes him out with finality.

-(/)-

Rage twisted and churned inside Loki. He clenched his fists until fingernails dug inside pale flesh.

The Doctor was curled up atop the rubble. His limbs felt like heavy rubber.

"I suppose you weren't expecting this. Then again, it's not every day you put that toy against a psychic race with two hearts," he coughed out.

Loki was stilled in shock, but only briefly until his anger flamed and lashed.

" _You knew!_  This entire time and not once did you care to utter a single word! I trusted you, and you hid my nature from me since the beginning! You are no different from Odin!"

"Listen, I—"

"Still your words—"

" _No_ , it's time for you to listen. For once, you're going to listen to reason." Sharp pain ebbed at the surface of skin, burrowing inside. He willed his neck to crane up and stared down Loki. "You are not the only one to hurt, to experience pain. You're not the first to lash out. Or the last. But if you let me, I can help you. You don't have to be alone."

The scepter whispered truths to Loki.

Loki's boot slammed on the Doctor's stomach. He pressed it to the man's throat, effectively silencing him.

_Please, please, please let me help you. Maybe I don't have to die. Maybe you don't have to bring forth Ragnarok. We can run. We can escape._

"You left the others, and the damage went both ways. I felt so much anguish for your abandonment, but it appears to be a reoccurring joviality on your behalf. Our ties are cut, tis you who shall be left behind."

_I'm so, so sorry._

By the time the Doctor managed to heave himself off the ground, the god vanished. He ignored the bruises and scrapes, and limped back to the TARDIS. He left the behind the forgotten palace, content with not knowing the truth. He pressed in the coordinates and rested against the wall.

Eyes closed, the Doctor let himself believe that he would see Loki again before dying.

_"Hey, what are friends for if they can't stop each other from destroying the universe?"_


	3. Farewell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set after series 6 and at the end of the Avengers movie. Stay tuned for the sequel Dead Men Walking which will contain more of a plot~! Up to chapter 6 of DMW is posted at my ff.net but will be coming quickly to AO3

In the Midst of Liars

The Doctor knelt before the king, and apologies didn't stop flowing from his mouth.

  
**Chapter Three:**  Farewell

As always, the Doctor knew how to make an entrance.

Six heroes standing over a war criminal stiffened at whizzing sound echoed in Stark's bar. Only Steve Rogers turned, seeing the sound was followed by a Police Call Box appearing from seemingly nowhere.

One of two things crossed all of their minds:  _surely, this is another one of Loki's tricks_  or  _we sure as hell can't fight off another invasion._

Once a man stepped out of the blue box, Steve decided that it couldn't be another invasion. He could appreciate the man's suspenders, but were bow ties truly fashionable in the modern age? The silly appearance of the stranger was put off by his grim expression; the thin line of his lips made a solid frown, his aura reminding Steve of a soldier who seen too much and was faced with tragedy once more.

"Keep your focus on Loki," the Captain ordered his team.

The stranger's eyes widened for a moment, and then quickly locked onto Loki. The captain noted this, and shifted to block the peculiar stranger's path.

Steve gave him a quizzical, hardened stare, though he was sure the weariness of battle showed.

"And just who are you, sir?"

Meanwhile, Stark disobeyed orders and sauntered to the bar. This whole scene screamed the need for a drink, or five. Before the stranger could speak, Stark answered for him. "He's the Doctor, of course." That's when everybody, including the god still pushed up against the wall, gave him the 'what the hell' look. Stark shrugged. "I hacked SHIELD and their dirty little secrets, remember? He's listed as friendly. Highly dangerous, but friendly. When all else fails, call the Doctor. It's a shame his number wasn't listed."

The Doctor nodded and his frown deepened. "They should have contacted me much sooner. As soon as disaster hit New York, SHIELD sent word to UNIT and Torchwood, who got word to me."

Natasha and Barton seemed to be the only ones who fully understood what the nonsense.

The Doctor's attention never strayed from Loki. The god sat, back propped up weakly against a wall. Bruised, beaten, and battered, Loki still used his remaining strength to glare back. "Late as always," he spat.

"You wouldn't expect that from a time traveler," Stark interjected as he deftly mixed himself a drink inside his thoroughly trashed tower. "What? I read. Anyone else want a drink?"

Everyone ignored Stark's offer, but Natasha was sure she wasn't the only one filing away the time traveling remark. Director Fury was keeping more from them than she anticipated.

"The coordinates were a bit bumpy. This is a fixed point in time now, so no going back. I'm so sorry."

"Ever the apologizer," Loki murmured. He then caught himself staring at that ridiculous bow tie. "I see that you have required new skin to accompany this ridiculous fashion."

"I've been up to a few things myself. Not nearly as busy as you it seems."

"Perhaps I'll set my eyes on that lovely country of yours next. Britain, yes?"

It took effort, but Loki managed a devious smirk.

The Doctor strode pass the others, and bent a knee in front of Loki. The Hulk, despite being more than disgruntled, let him after a pleading look from Thor. Everyone was curious of the nature of the two's relationship.

Being only a breath a part, Loki recalled when they were closer.

Without the announcing of identity, without the TARDIS, Loki still would have known. He rolled around in merely a fraction of the Doctor's mind, but they were connected in way these fools couldn't comprehend. He  _saw_. He  _understood_. He knew how to  _break_.

"That promise beneath the stars, the one promise to become king and end mindless bloodshed, it didn't have to end like this," the Doctor reminded him. He wanted to clutch the little boy again, to whisper soothing lullabies.

"Oh, but Doctor, it did!" Loki chuckled. "I witnessed the after effects of these petty mortals, what they did to you, how you always need new skin because of them. How they haunt your mind, and wreak havoc on their own planet. They needed to be ruled. I did this for you."

The Doctor swallowed, ignoring the jab at his two hearts. "Something has twisted you. You did this to become a selfish ruler, Loki, nothing more," he said finally.

"Always rooting for the humans, always rescuing them, always allowing yourself to be hurt; to be stripped of your rightful place—above them! You are superior. Do not let such emotions and feelings fog your vision, my dear Doctor. You can be so much more if you wouldn't fight me as I free you from the shackles. Together, we can—"

He put a finger against Loki's lips. "I have failed you, Loki. I have failed Asgard, Jotunheim, and Earth."

_Time and time again, you fail._

Thor put a heavy hand on the Doctor. Although still confused on what happened between his brother and the Doctor, pain was visibly eating away at the Doctor. The same in Thor's heart, he knew the parasite too well. "Doctor, you have failed no one. Alas, I should have kept an eye on him."

"He's beyond redemption," added Hawkeye.

Thor disagreed with his friend who still had an arrow trained on his brother. The Doctor sadly shook his head. The Master reined inside his mind, constantly reminding how the Doctor couldn't save the fallen Time Lord, and history is bound to repeat itself.

_Everybody deserves a chance of redemption._

In the end, the Master saved the Doctor. Some time before the end, Loki lifted the Doctor from his depression after the Time War.

Must they both receive a horrid fate?

"Let me help you," pleaded the Doctor. "You and me in TARDIS, traveling through galaxies and times far, far away from Asgard and Midgard. Beyond the Nine Realms and—"

The roar of a helicopter's engine and cutting blades disrupted the Doctor mid-speech. One could hear a ladder falling to the ground, accompanied by the hard thump of a grown man's body sliding to the ground. "Step away," commanded the authoritative voice of Director Fury, "from the criminal."

"But he's the Doctor," Tony cheerfully said, just wanting to go against the one eyed terror. "Listed as friendly, possible alley. Your reports forgot to mention the bow-tie."

Director Fury briefly studied the man who was still kneeling in front of Loki. Judging from the blue box beside him, Fury decided that the man was indeed the Doctor.

"I don't give a damn if he's the king of England. Loki is now a war criminal and prisoner. SHIELD will take it from here, Doctor."

As Fury started striding towards the kneeling Doctor, Thor put an unyielding hand against the Director's chest. "The Doctor and Loki are old friends. This may be a chance for peace for my brother and this planet."

The Doctor didn't budge, not even when Fury trained a gun on his back.

"I promised to stop you from destroying the universe. What kind of friend would I be if I can't stop you from further harming a planet? You, me, and the stars. What do you say?"

For a moment, however brief, Loki imagined the blue string of the cosmos—of their shared history.

Loki's green eyes bore into the Doctor. He thought of their previous travels, of their promises, of their little games played back when he was a boy not yet hidden in the shadows. He thought of how far he has fallen, and now felt like a boy again with his Doctor, so tall in front of him. No one else, not even the ominous shadow of Director Fury, mattered. Just him and the Doctor amongst rubble once more.

It made it so much easier to say the one simple word; to break the Doctor.

"Nay."

-(/)-

Only Loki, the Doctor, Director Fury, and Agent Hill remained in Stark Tower. The rest went to the Shwarma joint, with serious convincing to Thor. ("I swear on my mother's honor, it'll be okay," the Doctor said.) Although Loki had a feeling that the Director wanted to keep the Avengers in the dark as much as he could about the time traveler for now.

Since Loki's refusal, the Doctor had moved away from the Trickster God.

"I doubt he can even move properly, much less cause havoc, so if you would kindly lower those guns…"

The Doctor now leaned against the sofa, obviously worn out. Whatever occurred before his arrival had taken its toll.

"He doesn't have to move," said Agent Hill. "That tongue of his can be more dangerous than any weapon."

She wanted nothing more than to put a bullet through the supposed  _god's_ head. The villain killed her friends and colleges. Agent Coulson needed to be avenged. Loki needed to pay. She cursed this Doctor who wanted to help the would-be conqueror. Although she wasn't as up to date as Fury was on the man, she knew the time traveler was highly dangerous.

"A common tactic you also employ, Doctor," reminded Director Fury.

The Doctor could not look at Loki as he spoke.

"I have something that might help." He paused, as if unsure of what he was about to go through with.  _No_ echoed like a cold wind. "I suppose you aren't familiar with the Capistrum. No? It's a high tech muzzle. Picked it up while vacationing on the moons of Venus. My bunkie kept yakking and yakking, anyways, the cruise ship stopped at a quaint little aisle. Long story short, I stopped a volcano from erupting and—"

"Get to the point,  _Doctor_."

"I'll part with it with a few conditions. The main one being I want some questions answered. Might I add, you have a lovely eyepatch."

-(/)-

Loki pictured Yggdrasil. He sees her roots spread out through the galaxies. He sees her trunk extending through the stars. He sees her existing between here and not here. He pictured new life blossoming between her leaves. And he wondered if Yggdrasil lines out the new bodies for the Time Lords, if it's predestined as his fate to lose. Perhaps one day, he will ask the Doctor. A day far, far from now.

"Perhaps another lifetime, Doctor," the near immortal said while eyeing the advanced muzzle, "we can dance however we please without yielding to the shadows. But not this one."

The Doctor did not tell him that Time Lords are not reborn like gods.

They were on an aircraft to a temporary SHIELD base. Loki sat in shackles between Thor and Captain America, across from the Doctor. Stark was doing maintenance on his tower, Banner deciding it was best to help. Barton and Natasha rode in the front, briefing their boss on what transpired on the battlefield.

The strange man was using his sonic screwdriver on the muzzle, his brow knitted in concentration. Though Loki was not present during the exchange between the Doctor and the Director, the sullen expression afterwards said enough.

"Three days, seventeen hours, and two minutes."

Thor's chuckle resonated in the small space like thunder. "Ah, I still do not understand you."

"That is the exact moment of my death," he responded casually without looking up. "You see, Loki, there's some things you can't escape. No much dirt I dig up to unearth  _why_ I'll meet my untimely end, I can't escape it." He set the muzzle down to his side. He let out a long sigh. "I suppose I should indulge you in some truth before I leave. Consider it a would-be coronation gift."

There was brief silence, even in the cockpit.

"One last game between us. Have I ever told you how I met your father?"

Loki said nothing. Odin and Laufey meant little more than the rubble he created. The prick of the cosmos reminded him that the Doctor's past extended further. Thor leaned in with keen intention, not knowing who the Doctor meant.

"Both men are dead to me, and only one in the figurative sense," spoke Loki. "But I am curious of Laufey."

"Ah yes, the Peace Conference of the Aqua Asteroid… No, no, before that. I was a wee lad, barely at the cusp of my fourth decade. Before graduating from the academy, we had to venture out to a budding civilization for a year. And, well, Jotunheim was new at the time, and Time Lords have a cold core temperature, so…"

The Doctor spoke fondly of the prince, of his wit in mind and of grace in battle. Most importantly, his fierce love for his people. Being the third child did nothing to squander the prince's dream of placing the crown on his head, of siring his own princes. Before the year was out, the Doctor befriended the jotun who towered over him.

"Naturally, a few centuries passed before I would see him again under more misfortunate circumstances. After witnessing the clash between the Jotunheim and Asgard, the Time Lords knew that they couldn't let events escalate. Funny how foresight couldn't be put in towards the Daleks. I mean really, do you know how annoying it is to fight with an enemy that sounds like a microwave? But I'm jumping ahead of myself again.

"After being called off from some splendid adventuring, the High Council chose me to be the advisor of Jotunheim. Personally, I like to believe it was due to my stylish scarf and given history, but I think good ol' Lord President had it out for me."

It sunk in that Loki killed one of the Doctor's friends.

The silence was broken by Thor's interjection. "What happens next, Doctor?"

"Tis not your game, Thor, but go on."

Loki was curious. The Doctor already talked of how he met Laufey, his father, why did he prattle on?

"Not that I want to bore you with the details, but needless to say, I didn't want to believe that Laufey would harm Earth for no reason. Human are going to become such marvelous creatures. When I didn't believe his lies, his lover magicked me into servitude. He was a beautiful, powerful sorcerer."

Loki stilled.

"I met Odin on the battlefield. By that man's beard, he was a force to be reckoned with. We became friends, kind of, after the war. A treaty was struck, overseen by Gallifrey's High Council." He leaned back and brushed his hands together. "And there you have it, how I met Laufey and Odin—whomever you believe to be your father. That's a choice only you can make."

The rest of the ride was spent in silence. As soon as the aircraft stopped, the Doctor requested a word alone with Loki. Fury compromised and left Thor with them. Everything spoken in all SHIELD vehicles were recorded anyways.

Thor heaved his brother to his feet as Steve stepped outside to give the makeshift family room.

 _The golden son and his shadow_ , thought the Doctor sullenly.  _Could this have ended any differently?_

_If I kept to myself, if I never went to Jotunheim or crashed in Asgard, if I never pushed Loki… well, it ends now at least._

"This is good-bye, Loki." The Doctor placed the muzzle firmly against the god's flesh. "In all my years, I hold the time spent with you close to my hearts." He kissed the metal coating Loki's cheek before walking out.

Loki could only stand there.  _Take me with you_ , he wanted to scream, but the metal silenced his pleas.

-(/)-

The moment the two brothers arrived in Asgard, no time was wasted. They forwent appealing before the court and inevitable public shaming. The guardsmen escorted Thor and the prisoner to a specially designed cell—the anti-magic variety. The loud footsteps behind them could indicate only one person. Loki turned to face Odin. He tilted his chin up and narrowed his brow, defiant as ever.

"Your anger is unbefitting, disallowing you to question the obvious," Odin said casually. "Who could have built this cell? The magic dwelling within the majority of Asgardians is not enough to contain you. The dwarves, skilled they may be, remain discontent with our previous dealings."

Thor voiced it in Loki's stead. "Who do you speak of, father?"

"An old friend of your mother's built this on your behalf as an apology. Correct," he answered Loki's shocked looked, "the Doctor. He felt he played a part in the destruction of Asgard and near annihilation of Jotunheim, and offered this cell as redemption."

Loki slumped back against the wall, ignoring the acidic feeling against his back. All that time with the Doctor, pouring over the mysteries of magic, and it was reduced to this—his prison.

"I take it he revealed the nature of our relations," the All-Father said. "He pleaded with me to take you in. Think of it, he said, the possibility to unite fallen people. The man stained with the blood of my subjects pleading with me for peace."

The King left.

A week passed in Asgard. It hardly meant a thing to a near immortal, yet it felt like it dragged on for a century. Thor visited him each day, and each day was met with silence.

Night sunk in. Despite no windows, Loki could feel it.

_"Three days, seventeen hours, and two minutes."_

The Doctor was dead.

The man who played an integral part of Loki's life, who damned and saved him, no longer existed. Only now could Loki see how much the Doctor cared. Despite his plans to destroy and conquer, the Doctor still desired to save him.

_If we can't stop…._

His mind raced.

Perhaps. Perhaps. Perhaps if he pleaded with norns. Perhaps if he convinced well enough, if he used his wicked silvertongue on Yggdrasil the Doctor could be reborn…

Morning came without Thor, but with Frigga.

Loki tried not to feel guilt as she wept, tried to convince himself that her actions were as worthy of his disdain and hatred as Odin's. In the end, he wanted to soothe away her tears. He wanted to spin stories and perform slight of hands; to grace a smile on her lips.

Yet she had the gall to apologize to him.

"I'm sure you know of the Doctor's death. It has been confirmed by Midgard's organization that Thor helps."

Loki has no choice but to be silent.

"I should have warned you." Her voice is soft and quiet and so full of sorrow. "There are rules that follow the Doctor. The first rule, the Doctor lies."

The second rule echoed in the cell, of truth and clarity.

"The Doctor always leaves."

The next several days and nights, Loki could do nothing but hopelessly, uselessly plot.

Thanos would come knocking on Earth's doorstep. Would Odin hand him over? Thor would fight it, of course. Loki knew that. He could pluck out all the stars from the sky, and Thor would still find a way to forgive him. He curled up on the ground, trying not to think about how he missed Thor's visits.

A way to slip out of this mess would be found. It had to be.

If only he had his magic or his voice. The Doctor robbed him of both, and torn his heart.

One night, when sleep finally hit him, he groggily awoke to a familiar yet foreign noise—the whizzing of the sonic screwdriver. Sharp green eyes snapped open; ready to kill however nicked the device from his fallen friend. By the time he weakly pushed his body off of the stone slab of a bed, the cell door opened.

"No time to waste."

He stood face to face with his Doctor. The man extended his arm, pressed the 'magic' button on his screwdriver, and Loki's muzzle clanked loudly to the floor.

In a cracked voice, Loki repeated the first rule. "The Doctor always lies."

The Doctor grinned. "So speaks the god with a silvertongue. Whelp, c'mon now, we have another death to fake and cell to burn. I don't want Odin having my head as tacky decor."

"I do not understand," Loki admitted flatly.

Bypassing the ache in his steps, Loki limped to the Doctor's side. Trembling hands held the Doctor's face, trying to desperately understand. It didn't make sense. The Doctor should be dead. The Doctor should hate him. Loki had been inside the Doctor's head, yet he didn't understand.

"Well, I faked my death and here to do the same with yours."

His hands fell back to his sides. He gripped the wide, white sleeves of his tunic. He pressed his forehead in nook of his Doctor's shoulders.

"That makes a tad more sense."

He shouldn't be crying.

"I faked my death, went back in time, and built this while you were trying to take over Earth just so I can properly bail you out of it? Though it seems Odin had some altercations taken to it."

The surrealism of it all was definitely fitting of the Doctor. Maybe his heartbeats were real, maybe his Doctor lived.

In grim night, they left a fake corpse in the room before setting it aflame. Loki had many enemies; his apparent death could be the result of any. He left the flickering flames of imprisonment behind, and ran to the TARDIS with the Doctor.

Back inside the Doctor's blue box, Loki let himself relax. The humming of the TARDIS soothed his core, and danced through the rest of his body. It couldn't have been too long, but she felt so much older. Time travel, Loki supposed. It appeared that the Doctor and he had much to catch up on. Speaking of, the odd man was absently twisting a few knobs on the TARDIS.

He was  _home_.

"I hurt you. I killed countless of your precious mortals." Why was he saying this? "I attempted to control this planet and take my place as ruler." He needed the muzzle back. "Chances are that I'll take the lives of more people one day."

The Doctor turned on his heels and leaned casually on the railing.

"Yes, I believe that's an accurate sum of events. Do you believe you are worth redemption, Loki?"

A long, tense silence filled Time and Space.

"Yes," he croaked out finally, unsure if it was a lie or not. And it was good enough for the Doctor.

"What do you say? A couple of dead men walking, gallivanting through time and space, seeing the endless wonders of the universe, and all we have to do is keep an extremely, and this is important,  _low_ - _key_  profile."

"I hate you," Loki said, not meaning a damn word of it.

"What you meant to say was: I can't wait."

"With a time machine, I suppose we do not."

They bantered back and forth as the Doctor set the coordinates for their next adventure. The TARDIS shook and spun, and they gripped the railing.

As his world shifted, Loki knew the day would arrive when he would have to face what has done to the man who saved him. Given the uncertainty of their two different life spans, Loki may outlive the Doctor if Thanos didn't kill him first. He allowed a small smile, praying for the day when the Doctor could forgive him.

The Doctor straightened on arrival, smoothing his bow-tie. Seeing the Trickster's smile, he manically hopped over the railing to reach Loki. He offered a hand, ready to journey to their next adventure, together once more. Of all his companions, the Doctor decided that Loki would be the death of him.

Not that he had any quarrel with that.

**Author's Note:**

> Crossposting from my ff.net account. Same username minus the underscores. 
> 
> The Doctor has a very long list of things he feels guilty for. Let's add this to it! :D


End file.
